Page 4 - Stan Frank Diaries

drill sergeants out-rank Dukes.
Geordie Robson won the farting competition after lights out.

11th Jan
It was Bartlett’s birthday so the whole squad gave him the bumps. Unfortunately they tossed
him too high, failed to catch him and he ended up in the MRS.
Note to self. Never disclose your D.0.B to anyone.
Bumpered the floor. Still haven’t been given a gun.
Spotted on the wall of the ablutions 76D2EL

12th Jan
Wrote to all my relatives to tell them never to send birthday cards or gifts - it’s a long walk to
the MRS.
Scorched my SD trousers. Rubbed the offending area with a half crown - panic over.

13th Jan
At present the Russians are pissing off the Americans over Cuba. We all had to go to the air-
raid shelters. It was dark and smelled of urine. We were asked by the CSM what precautions
we should take in the event of a four minute warning.
McGuiness recommended wearing ear plugs combined with dark glasses to avoid the glare.
He also suggested drinking milk to ameliorate the effects of radiation. He’s a f*cking
Bomhead sweating on Best AT.
A voice in the darkness suggested shagging the WVS lady. The brave lad who uttered the
remark forgot that CSMs can see in the dark. Rodeo beckons.

14th Jan
Caught walking to the NAAFI whilst not swinging my arms. Had to clean the ablutions with
my toothbrush. All Jeeps have to swing their arms shoulder high wherever they go, or expect
to buy a new toothbrush. The higher you are up the food chain - the less you have to swing
your arms.
No weapons issued yet. I do have some ammo pouches, some ammo boots, but no ammo.
Apparently ammo pouches work better when they’re blanco-ed…… as do web belts.

15th Jan
Pay parade. Got ten shillings and sixpence. The rest goes into credits (whatever they are).
Sheet exchange. Remember to pick up my Dobie.
Took turns today in drilling the squad. Wheeler marched us down the cookhouse steps. I lost
count performing Right Marker.

2oth Jan
Assault course 1000hrs. The water jump was iced over. Bartlett slipped on his arse.
Was sent to the NAAFI by some 7 Div lance jack for a ‘long weight. (Wait?).

23rd Jan
The pipes are frozen in the spiders - some of the lucky bastards may be sent home. Jeepland
pipes are not affected - Bugger.

1st Feb
Started training for the Inter-Squad Drill Competition. I don’t reckon on our chances. We
have Wheeler in our squad who doesn’t know his arse from his anklets.