Page 3 - Stan Frank Diaries

Stan Frank Diaries Episode 2

Following further excavations of the building thought to be Jeepland, located within the
remains of the Army Apprentice School/College Arborfield late last year, plus the excellent
response from members of this site in deciphering some of the more obscure phrases, our
experts at the Imperial War Museum have been able to piece together further fragments of
Stan Frank’s diaries.

3rd Jan
Discovered Reveille wasn’t a magazine.
Issued with our kit at the QMs. The room corporal said I looked like a bag of shit. Those of
us who weren’t ‘bags of shit’ were ‘Schmos‘. I asked the bloke next to me ‘What’s a
Schmo?’ He reckoned it was someone who tucked his shirt into his shreddies.

4th Jan
Made to form up outside Jeepland in our new SDs. Wheeler had his anklets on the wrong
feet. Wheeler is a Schmo.
Discovered the art of Jipping. Or to be more precise, the art of being jipped. Jeeplanders are
the lowest form of life. It seems that anyone, even a stray cat can push in front of us at the
cookhouse. Any form of protest results in a fat lip .....or a nasty scratch.

5th Jan
New arrivals are known as Jeeps. Actually we are all ‘f*cking Jeepland Jeeps‘. Nothing to do
with motor vehicles or fornication. You can always spot a fellow Jeep - it looks as though
he’s smuggling a dinner-plate under his beret.

Gym today. We were introduced to the PTIs. They all looked like brick shit-houses with legs.
I asked Digger Diamond why we had to blacken our brown plimsolls. He made me hang from
the wall bars.

6th Jan
First day of serious square bashing. There was a lot of shouting and stamping of feet. It seems
we have to do everything by numbers. Fortunately you only need to be able to count to three.
There was a lot of …one… two… three… one…. two.. Three… one-ing. We were informed
that for the first three months of our army career we have to ‘one… two…three…one’ more
or less everything. Unless you are a Junior Leader, they’ve yet to find one who can count.

7th Jan
Marched to the camp barber for a bonehead. I asked the butcher/barber if he wouldn’t mind
leaving my side-burns intact. He said he did mind. I found out later that you could go to Shag
Twining and pay a shilling for a decent trim in the Spiders. It would be a foolish Jeeplander
who ventured into the Spiders.
Introduced to beezing - the general idea is to turn your toe-caps into convex shaving mirrors.

8th Jan
Got bollocked for having a Windsor Knot in my tie. I thought what’s good enough for the
Duke of Windsor is good enough for me. Sgt. Pittendreigh thought otherwise. In Jeepland the